by Eric Pryne
Seattle Times staff reporter
The conversations were supposed to be political, but participants were given ample leeway to decide for themselves just what that meant.
Mostly, they talked about children.
The connection? David Eberharter articulated one, after nearly two hours of talk about the shrinking dollar, two-income families, undisciplined kids and unprincipled politicians:
How, he asked, can this year's crop of candidates help parents "have the time to actually be parents and raise up another generation that has some integrity?"
A generation "that's worth voting for," Christine Buck added.
Buck, a Green Lake real-estate agent, and Eberharter, a Magnolia contractor, were among 33 Washingtonians who participated in three separate discussions late last month on money, values, government and the links between them.
The two-hour sessions in Seattle, Burien and Yakima were sponsored by the Front Porch Forum, a reporting partnership of The Seattle Times, KCTS-TV (Channel 9), and National Public Radio stations KPLU (88.5 FM) and KUOW (94.9 FM).
In this election year, the project aims to find out what's on citizens' minds, then press candidates to address those concerns.
The discussions, known among public-opinion researchers as "focus groups," were convened to explore some of the more striking findings of a statewide Front Porch Forum poll conducted this spring.
Nearly half the 570 survey respondents said they worry about keeping their jobs. Yet by a wide margin, they also said the moral climate is a greater threat to the nation's families than the economic climate.
Those findings served as starting points for the focus groups. The free-flowing conversations touched on everything from tort reform to taxes, from bilingual education to Beavis and Butthead.
But in all three sessions, the randomly selected participants quickly connected moral decline with imperiled children.
Too many kids aren't being brought up right, they agreed. The consequences: crime, drug abuse, violence.
Values should be taught at home, most said, but many homes aren't what they were a generation ago. Each focus group devoted considerable attention to the rise in two-income households and its effect on children.
Some participants shared stories of tough choices, of personal trade-offs.
Debbie Dustin of Shoreline quit teaching when the first of her three sons was born 15 years ago; it was more important, she and her husband agreed, that she be available full-time for the children.
Dustin said she doesn't regret that decision, but it came at a price. College expenses for her sons loom. "We don't have the income that these two-income families have. . . . There are sacrifices that are real difficult."
Denise Carpenter of Des Moines and her husband weren't satisfied with the public school their two children attended, so they enrolled them in a private school. It was the right choice, Carpenter said; her children are better people for it.
But to pay the tuition, Carpenter said she now spends more hours away from the children at her part-time job.
Other participants said both parents work in many families by choice, not necessity.
In Yakima, Sharon Glenn, mother of grown children, made the same point. Both parents often work so they can buy their kids the latest Disney-movie toys - that the children quickly lose or forget, she said; those children grow up in day care, disconnected.
The culture at large sends the wrong moral messages to children, many agreed. Rudeness is the norm, in stores and on the freeway. The media glorify materialism and violence.
When corporations sacrifice workers for higher profits, that's immoral, too, said Larry Robinson, who lives in the University District.
Government also came under fire from some for abetting moral decay. At each session, at least one participant suggested child-abuse laws had made some parents fearful of disciplining their children.
What's more, it seems everyone's a victim now, several said. "I'm just amazed at the skill with which people are able to explain why whatever happened isn't their fault," said Tom Eastgard of Crown Hill. Others cited the courts and the welfare system as institutions that help discourage personal responsibility.
Schools aren't doing their job right, several participants said. "There's literally no respect. (Students) can do whatever they want," said Judy Heiland, a school-district secretary from Burien.
But others said parents now expect schools to assume most child-raising responsibilities, then protest when school officials try to discipline their children.
Government could play a role in helping children and improving the moral climate, some participants said. Tim Hell of Federal Way said he might be willing to pay higher taxes to support worthwhile youth programs.
But others said government should pull back, not step in. "Why are we giving them more money to solve a problem that they've shown they already can't solve?" asked Jill Boyd, a Tukwila homemaker and former teacher.
Disgust with politicians was near-universal among the focus-group participants. Politicians don't live the values they preach, several said: They say one thing, then do another. Most run for office for personal gain, not public service.
"They're not modeling moral behavior or integrity, so that has an effect throughout the whole society," David Eberharter said of politicians.
When he and others were asked what they wanted candidates in this fall's elections to talk about, they spoke less of programs and easily definable issues than of underlying principles and values, such as honesty and accountability.
"What government can do is clean up the system," said Ken Spohn of Renton.
Primary responsibility for improving the nation's moral climate remains with the home and community, not the government, all agreed.
When she was a child, Gina Softley of SeaTac said, concerned adults kept an eye on her as she walked to and from school, made certain she didn't get into trouble. She said she tries to do the same in her neighborhood now, breaking up fights, upbraiding children when they swear.
"I know they look at me like, `Who do you think you are?' " she said. "I don't care, because I know we were put on this Earth to take care of each other, not just take care of my own."